Talk therapy: Does it help?

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For me, it's about time I tell you that talk therapy for me, doesn't help really. Is it the type or particular therapist I have? I don't know? Right now, I have a male figure, when in the past I have had female psychotherapists. I think that is what they call them.

Anyway - what do we talk about? Well - we go over what I've been experiencing lately....starting with the phrase "so what's been going on?", or "how are you feeling?". I kinda am getting aggrevated by this process, cuz it doesn't seem to be helping to talk to a stranger about my problems. I thought it may have helped in the past, to bounce ideas off of the person, but really, anymore? It seems pointless. I have got to say something to them, because I have to pay for it, and gosh darn it, what am I afraid of?

Well first off, what if social security finds out that I haven't been seeing a therapist? What will that do? Well - what should it do? Nothing? My friends don't go to see anyone, as they feel the same way, high cost, and what will they help with? Others, just don't go. They cannot do anything, because talk therapy really doesn't help everyone. I don't think it is mandatory, just like work isn't mandatory if you are disabled. So, I think I am going to stop seeing my therapist, tell my mental health doctor, that I don't feel it's helping, and that I only want to see him for my meds. But again - my meds, what a joke. I don't even think this next time that I see the doctor, in about 20 days will even produce prescriptions, because I don't think I can afford any of them, since I have a backup of one month's written anyhow....well maybe just let him know that I may not be able to fill all of them, ask for his help in defraying the cost and how to do it, since I am in the doughnut hole (which I was told that the Obama administration is trying to abolish, which is a great thing. You pay for all this insurance, right, but you still have to pay for meds out of pocket - ridiculus! If they get rid of it, I wonder how soon, will that mean I can go back to Abilify for a drug of choice for my bipolar??)

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I don't think wasting any more money for talk therapy is going to harm me. Let me try it for a few months, and if I need to go back to it, then I will readmit myself. But for right now, I need a mental health doctor, to help fill out my disability paperwork. Ask him two things, if he will still be able to help me fill out my paperwork and if he is willing to proceed without my use of a therapist due to funds being not there. See - they haven't even found out if I can obtain financial assistance through their facility, which is stupid, I gave them the information over a month ago, and I am still getting billed! Ridiculus!

Overall, I must say that over time, the early use of talk therapy was helpful in understanding myself and ways to cope with situations. Although I feel that I am fully developed as best as I can be regarding this idea of "coping", nothing I cannot gain from changing my behaviors, which is the whole idea of therapy. I do have to change my behaviors. Become more sexual, accept sex as a normal and healthy, "healthy" being the number one idea behind that subject, and deal with stresses by way of behavior modification. Like doing yoga, which was suggested to me yesterday, or actually, just doing some breathing exercises. I told the guy that I was using the Wii Fit to do Yoga and other daily exercises, he said "that was good" and so by not screaming or giving in to high stress behviors like losing my temper or fighting heavily with my girlfriend, then I should succeed in my fight against this disease without the aid of talk therapy.

Remember, anything that you say in a meeting goes into your medical file, so I tend to honestly not go into detail about every little nuiance that has happened because I just don't want that to be part of my health file....but you can also review it and ask them to make changes if you see errors within the file.

So, good luck to all of you who will continue to proceed in seeing a therapist, in a talk session, I just don't think it is someone where I get any help. I am doing it out of being used to it and thinking inside the box, that I have to take medication and have to use talk therapy otherwise I will lose benefits or get unhealthy again. My behaviors have changed, I hope they continue to stay changed and continue to change for the better in the future. My health seems to depend on that fact.